Something I've learned...

 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' – John Gray

To ask a man for support:

1.       Be direct.

2.      Be brief.

3.      Use “would you” or “will you” phrases.

It’s best not to be too indirect, too lengthy, or to employ phrases such as “could you” or “can you.” Let’s look at some examples.

Do say: “Would you empty the trash?”
Don’t say: “This kitchen is a mess; it really stinks. I can’t fit anything else into the trash bag. It needs to be emptied. Could you do it?” (This is too long and uses could.)

Do say: “Would you please put this away for me?”
Don’t say: “I can’t put all of this away.” (This is an indirect message.)

Do say: “Would you bring the groceries in from the car?”
 Don’t say: “I have four bags of groceries left in the car. And I need that food to make dinner. Could you bring them in?” (This is too long, indirect, and uses could.)

Do say: “Would you take us out to dinner tonight?”
Don’t say: “I am too tired to make dinner. We haven’t gone out in a long time. Do you want to go out?” (This is too lengthy and indirect.)

Men are much more willing to say yes if they have the freedom to say no.

A relationship is healthy when both partners have permission to ask for what they want and need, and they both have permission to say no if they choose.

One of the key elements of assertive asking is to remain silent after you have asked for support.

Random Quotes

“It's much easier to become interested in others than it is to convince them to be interested in you” - Andrew Carnegie